AUTISM is...

Its more than statistics, more than children seen rocking back and forth, more than "rain man". Autism is the biggest roller coaster I have ever been on. Autism is amazing, laughing, smiling, giggling, loving, caring, and courageous. Austism is frightening, frustrating, head banging, eye gouging, rough, and tempermental. Above all, Autism is Us. It is who we are now. One of us cannot adapt to the rest of us, so the rest of us have adapted to one of us. Autism is acceptance, it is patience, it is endurance and strength. Autism is learning. Autism is teaching. Autism is the twinkle in his eye as he places the letters upon the board in PERFECT allignment, first the red, then the yellow and then the green and blue. Autism is my son...

Friday, January 22, 2010

Call me slow... But I just dont get it...

Why does my blood pressure go through the roof when I look into my sweet 3 year olds eyes after this last week? He has always been a child of 2 colors... either very white and innocent and sweet... or very black and naughty and down right evil at times... He got strep throat last week... and since then it has been utter hell on wheels. I just dont get it. Why must we whine and throw a tantrum at the very second he doesnt think he is getting what he wants? Why must we pull the dry cereal out of the box and drop the flakes one by one onto the floor from the counter? Why must we again pull that dry cereal out of the box, place the box on the floor on its side and put our 2 handfuls of cereal on top of the box and smash it? Why must we feed the fish (which we are not supposed to be feeding to start with) every morsel of fish food we can find in the house? and why OH WHY... must we put the word mom at the end of EVERYTHING we say to mom? (and its not just "mom" its Mooooooooommmmm" Call me slow, But I just dont get it...

"mom can I have a popcicle moooommmm?"
no, not right now.
"You dont let me eat ANYTHING mooommmm! - Can I have chips?"
no, not right now.
"You GET ME some chips... I want Chips Mooooommmm!"

oh dear... what has happened to this sweet child? He suddenly thinks that he owns the place or something. It is sort of funny in that not-so-funny way, that he thinks I am actually going to do these things that he is ORDERING me to do... and then when I dont... well you guessed it... ALL hell brakes loose. We scream, We throw our selves on the floor and kick our feet and bang our fists... all to be ignored by me... Mooooommmm. Then when that doesnt work we walk up to moooooommmmm and put our hands straight up in the air and jump up and down with our palms against mom... (which given his height, when he stands in front of me and does this, well lets say from an adult standpoint I'm sure it doesnt look very appropriate!) (oh and I should mention that this is probablys my BIGGEST pet peeve!)and of course we are whining the whole time we are doing this... about what ever it is that we want that mom isnt jumping right up to serve us on a golden platter...

and this has been non stop for the last ohh about 10 days...

Maybe that is why my blood pressure goes throught the roof when I see his sweet little face...

ooh yes.. I love him...

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